I WAS excited to read news that human cloning could become a reality in the near future.

It's not beyond the bounds of possibility that I could create an entire race of Charles Manns in the next few years. A whole tribe of handsome, super-intelligent columnists could be spawned thanks to the new technology.

But, by the same token, millionaires such as Jeffrey Archer could pay to have themselves cloned.

You could suddenly find us invaded by thousands of lying, arrogant novelists. There wouldn't be enough bookshops in the world, let alone rainforests, to cope with that mass of banality.

But worse still, you could find our local councillors cloning themselves. They could create a new species of super-councillor, armed with smug grins, meaningless platitudes and ideas that never get anywhere.

I actually always thought our present councillors were clones of each other. They all drop the word 'clearly' in every sentence to give their speeches gravitas, and promise to take your views 'on board' even though they've never been near a ship all their lives.

And, they all appear and disappear at the same time. You see masses of them on your doorstep at election time, and then they go away and hibernate.

Some turn up on the letters page of the Bucks Free Press and others at civic functions, but I'd defy any layman to name more than three members of the county or district council.

Yes, they are largely an irrelevant bunch these days, especially since the inception of cabinet government, where a breed of councillors called Portfolio Holders makes all the decisions.

So I have to agree with ex local councillor David Coe who wrote to this paper last week bemoaning the fact that Wycombe District was refusing to cut its numbers from 60 to 43.

Add this 60 to the number of county and parish councillors in the district and you'll see we're overrun.

I say cut them down to half-a-dozen accountable highly-paid and highly-capable politicians for each district.

No one will miss the lost councillors, and local government will be all the more efficient and democratic.

And, if you really do have to clone anyone, why not a few strikers for injury-hit Wycombe Wanderers?