THE thought of grandma and grandpa visiting a sex therapist to improve their love making may be an unsettling one for many young people.

Do pensioners even have sex at all? Isn't it all about being 'best friends' when you get past 60?

Not so says Teresa May, Marlow's resident sex guru. "It is a misconception that old people don't have sex," she said. "Some of our clients are in their 70s and they are keen to overcome impotence."

The petite woman, who hails from Hong Kong, has spent the last 11 years guiding couples through a vast array of sexual problems, delving into their history and digging out the roots.

Many a marriage has been pulled back from the brink of divorce because of Teresa's hard work.

And with people aged from 18 to 70, from the very poor to the very rich, black, white and Asian, Teresa has a wealth of knowledge that rivals half-pint sex specialist Doctor Ruth.

Teresa works out of Relate's unassuming portacabins in Maidenhead, catering for people from Buckinghamshire and the Royal Borough of Windsor and Maidenhead, but says she would like to work within Marlow.

She added: "I have always felt Marlow needed something like this and I would be more than happy to take-up that post. We have lots of clients coming from Marlow. I think there's definitely a demand for it."

Teresa, of Hyde Green, has been rushed off her feet recently owing to the successful Channel Four series Better Sex which finished this week.

Two years in the making, the series explored the work of Relate's Psychosexual Therapy service, following couples through the treatment process.

Teresa commented on the programmes: "I think it has been an excellent series and has encouraged people to come forward. I think a lot of people identified with the problems in the series."

Teresa, who has been a counsellor with Relate since 1989, qualifying in psychosexual therapy in 1995, helps couples overcome any sexual problem you care to think of.

She said: "With men quite a lot of the time it is secondary impotence. Previously they are able to get good erections and now they can't for a variety of reasons." But Teresa warns that Viagra is not the cure all that some may think. She said many couples will need help adjusting to the sudden change in their lives that Viagra can bring.

With women she explained that the problem can often be a lack of sexual desire: "It can be brought on by psychological problems, fear or child birth perhaps."

Teresa needs to dig into a couple's background before she can begin to offer advice and sometimes unearths dark and disturbing issues from child abuse to domestic violence.

The mother-of-one, who has lived in Marlow for 23 years, said: "You do come across all sorts of things in this job. If I come across possible child abuse then after informing my supervisor and manager we may have to break client confidentiality. In the case of domestic violence against an adult I would encourage the victim to seek help, either from support groups or the police but it is down to them. That is definitely the most difficult part of the job."

She added: "There is a lot of emotional baggage we have to take on from other people. I have to leave it where it is and not take it home. When you first start counselling it is extremely hard to do that."

Teresa may know her subject but she doesn't promise to have all the answers: "It can happen sometimes that you work so closely with a couple."

She added: "The right therapy can save someone's marriage or relationship. Sometimes it is very difficult with warring couples. They are very angry with each other. What is so positive about sexual therapy is that the improvement is very visible. Within ten sessions you can see a big difference.

"I have had couples come to me on the verge of breaking-up as a last attempt to save their relationship. At the end they say their sexual and general relationship is so much better. They are much happier and they now decide they have a great future together which is very heart warming for me. That is absolutely the best part of what I do."

But does all this experience make Teresa's 27-year marriage a bed of bliss.

She said: "I have known colleagues to have sexual and personal problems within relationships and I know there is not always the perfect solution. Just as doctors get ill, we come across problems within relationships, but working in this area does help us to resolve problems."

If you would like help with relationship problems call the centre on (01628) 625320