A funny thing happened on the way to the forum. I bumped in to Mr Bean, or I thought I had until I saw Paul Goodman written on his rosette.

The conservative candidate's likeness to the accident prone Bean is uncanny, and it has not gone unnoticed by Paul himself, who told us a group of schoolgirls had burst out laughing just as he was about to start a speech.

Labour's Chauhdry Shafique was next up but sounded too much like one of Millbank's party political broadcasts where they chuck out dozens of good looking stats hoping one might stick.

The Liberal Democrats feel confident of making inroads here, especially in Marlow, and their candidate Dee Tomlin couldn't stop referring to the place as she talked about that strange oxymoron - honest politics.

Green candidate John Laker is one person who can't forget Marlow as he lives there and encouraged us to boo when he read out a list of the people he says rule the world- the multi- national companies, but nobody made a sound.

A cheeky plug for his £1.50 manifesto and a strange attempt to make a pact with the UKIP followed before he made way for anti-European Christopher Cooke.

Cooke looked like he was going to burst out of his suit as he argued the case for the UK's withdrawal from the European Union. He may have no chance of winning but got the loudest clap of the night.

Smooth talking host John Waite then took questions, firstly about foot and mouth.

Shafique obviously hadn't spoken to any farmers judging by his efforts to find out about the crisis

And Mr Bean, predictably, came out with the typical Tory line that "Labour doesn't understand the countryside."

Cooke blamed the EU, like he would do about everything else for the rest of the night.

The most passionate debate of the night was health.

Labour was slammed by a nurse and Shafique defended the Government, but his long winded answers were by now turning into economics lectures.

Laker come up with an idea of having an MOT for things such as eye tests but you couldn't help thinking that people would be too lazy to make the appointment.

The Tory candidate seemed to be in his element when he banged his fists while arguing that more independent money was the answer.

But unfortunately the audience was not as passionate about his policies.

When I looked up Tomlin was busy looking through her manifesto - hadn't she read it beforehand? - but she seemed quite pleased to find that her party had suggested a commission to look at nurses' pay.

The biggest boo of the night was reserved for Goodman when he suggested that social problems were more the responsibility of the church and voluntary groups than politicians.

But the funniest moment came after Cooke told us that speeches in the European Parliament were limited to 90 seconds and in that case Shafique would be advised not to be a member.

We finished with the now famous two Jabs question and I will simply give you the candidates answer to what they would have done.

Goodman: Laugh

Shafique: Get Prescott (his shortest answer of the night)

Tomlin: Throw one back

Laker: Recycle it into an omelette

Cooke: It would be tremendous publicity. Whose got an egg?

But unfortunately nobody obliged.